An Awakened Understanding and a Last Tribute
by Hailofire
Summary: When some one is pushed beyond there limits something is always revealed, an understanding. But in the end only a tribute will remain to mark our passing. (Completed)


Ok, I own nothing right? Good also this is my first attempt at a darkish like fic so...(key word attempt). Anyway enjoy.

PS: I forgot this takes place during Third Impact.

**An awakened understanding and the last tribute**

'Shinji Ikari, the Third Child, pilot of Evangelion Unit-01. Yes that is what I am yet I am so much worse than that. I am a killer, a murder. I killed the only person to tell me that they loved me and I let all of those people down.' Shinji thought all of this while sitting under a stairwell, while all around him a battle raged. The JSSDF was attacking and killing of Nerv and yet Shinji just sat there wallowing in self-pity. 'I'm worthless. I can't even save the girl I love and I'm sick too doing what I did over her. And now I'm just letting these people die.'

As Shinji sat there a group of three men dressed in all black came walking up to the boy. "Look at that pathetic excuse for a human. He is just sitting there while all of his friends are dieing," said the commander of the group as they came up to the stairwell. When they stopped the commander pulled out his pistol and pointed it at the boys head. 'Look at him so pathetic. I can't look at him a second longer.' And with that thought the commander called out, "This thing isn't worth my attention. One of you kill him." The men just nodded.

Shinji upon hearing the man's words looked up. "What? What did you say," Shinji's voice was shaking slightly and was hardly more than a whisper but heard clearly in the silent hall.

"I said that you are worthless and a pathetic whimp. Or did you not hear me clearly, you fucker," yelled the commander?

'No I'm not worthless. I'm just not like you.' Thought Shinji as his mind raced, 'Asuka I'm not worthless, I'm not weak, damn you.' "You fucking bastard," said Shinji quietly as his eyes filled with a mad rage. His hand slowly drifted for a steel bar that lay next to him.

"What? You pathetic excuse for a human being," cried the commander. The man pulled up his pistol and walked toward Shinji anger clearly seen in his eyes.

Shinji's hand had since wrapped around the bar and his eyes now where glazed over in a mad rage. 'No. I'm not pathetic. I'm not weak; I just didn't want to hurt anyone, so I did nothing. Though it didn't help they all wound up hurt anyway.'

The commander slowly walked up to Shinji and in a slow deliberate motion looking rather forced. Just as the 9mm leveled and pressed hard against the boy's head the man spoke in a soft voice that only Shinji could here, "This is what you deserve, you worthless bastard."

That was the last straw it was the final shot to the boy's metal barrier. 'If they don't like me how I am then I will just let it all out.' And with that thought Shinji made up his mind. The commander saw only a slight blur as the bar grasped in Shinji's hand flew up and caved in the man's skull with a sickening wet crunch. "I'm not weak, you stupid bastard," screamed as his stood and with that crazed look still in his eyes rounded on the other two. It took a moment for the other two UN soldiers to grasp was going on and start for their weapons, but it was to late as Ikari swung the bar around and killed one with a impact to the head.

With both of his comrades dead at the hands of this fifteen year old boy with a metal bar, the last man was afraid. "I'm going to put the gun down and go away ok, kid." The man began to do just as he had said but the poor boy did not listen in his mad state. The bar came round with a dexterity that the boy had only showed before in playing the cello. Upon reaching its apex the piece of steel fell with enough force to shatter the soldiers shoulder since he had been able to move slightly.

"Ahhhh," screamed the man in pain and anger as he fired off a burst in the boy's direction. The thud, thud, thud of bullets contacting flesh could be heard as the Third Child smashed in the man's face.

Misato stood there staring in horror and shock at seeing the boy she had come to save kill three trained soldiers with nothing but a steel bar. This was not her Shinji, no he would never do that he would not kill those people even in self defense. The woman was startled out of her thoughts by a breath on her face. That's when Misato realized that Shinji was an inch from her face staring her in the eye. In his eyes the mad rage was slowly retreating to its hiding place.

"Misato," Shinji's voice was soft yet held not a trace of weakness or uncertainty?

"Yes, Shinji?"

"Take me to the Evas," Shinji said and then motioned for her to lead and at that point Misato noticed the fact that many bullets seemed to have bit into her charge, but he took no notice.

"Ok, Shinji let's go," the purple haired Major said slowly and began to walk.

'No more. I won't run or be weak any more. I must face them, all of them.' Shinji's thoughts continued along this line for some time as he and his would be mother walked through the destruction that was Nerv.

Up ahead of Shinji was a group of four UN soldiers that all seemed to be veterans from the way that they conducted themselves. 'So four against two that does seem unfair, I guess one will have to die instantly. Ok'

"Misato wait for my signal then start shooting, understood?"

Misato looked at this new Shinji that stood before her. 'He was so different he is a killer and confident. He was not the same shy boy she had known but what was it that had changed him?' Her thought was interrupted by Shinji's questions. "Yes, I understand."

Shinji only nodded and then looked back at the men that stood twenty feet down the hall. In a flash Shinji was in among them by the time they began to respond to this unexpected attack Shinji had drawn one man's knife and cut open his throat. As the blood sprayed out onto Shinji he jumped to the side and just missed a stream of bullets. "Now," yelled the young man as he landed his shoulder into one of the remaining soldiers. Misato responded by firing two short bursts that killed two of the UN commandos. Shinji's stolen knife finished the third.

The two companions continued down the hall to the lift that would take them to the eva cages. Misato thought of the boy that walked next to her and could not help but be amazed he had changed so much. 'He even looks different despite the fact that nothing physically has happened it must be the way that he carries himself. He's so confided and doesn't show any regret at killing those people.'

The Major's thoughts were interrupted by Shinji speaking shortly, "Misato I want to tell you why I can kill those people were I wouldn't have before." The women simply nodded. "I can do it now because I realized something and it took the commander back there to open it and that is that...sometimes you just have to kill and if you don't then people that you care for get hurt and that just isn't right. I just thought that you should know that."

The purple haired women just stared for a moment lost in thought. "I understand Shinji."

It was about twenty minutes later that the two stood before the eva cages. Shinji just stood before the purple unit in front of him and prepared for battle as Misato finished talking to the techs up overhead. "We are a go Shinji," Misato said in a sad and yet hopeful voice. The sounds of the battle up above them could be heard over the com.

Shinji patiently mount the plug and closed the hatch followed by the plug spinning into position. The unit activated and then the eyes slowly started to glow as Shinji came into synch with it. The glowing of the eyes intensified as the numbers on the techs control panel grew higher and higher. Over the com Shinji heard Asuka scream in rage and then surprise as the MP evas rose up again. "Asuka!!!" Shinji's voice was full of pain and rage that was slowly being freed of its control. 'I'm coming Asuka.'

As Shinji's scream faded the madness in his eyes began to return and bright glowing wings materialized from Unit-01's back. With another inhuman roar erupted from the evangelion's mouth. With that it took to the air rising out into the geofront to the sight of a lance flying toward Unit-02. "No, Asuka," screamed Shinji the mad rage returning more so to his eyes. As the lance struck all since of calm left the fifteen year old boy; he roared again and flew on his new wings to the white evas and with his bare hands ripped them apart. The blood ran down the purple unit's hands where it had crushed the S2 organ contained in each unit. The remains of all but the two units that stood before him littered the ground. Shinji's eyes still held there rage as he lunged at his next target the MP unit jumped into the air expanding its wings as it did so. Unit-01 quickly followed it up into the air as the other MP unit chased after the boy trying to gut him with the large blade in his hands. The first MP eva spun and dropped and spiraled but could not lose Unit-01 and in that realization it dropped like a stone strait to the earth. Shinji saw the MP eva in front of him falling to the ground, diving would be a better word for it, and took pursuit of the beast. They fell at such speed that the MP's primitive brain new that the fall would kill the unit the followed it so as it neared the ground it did nothing to slow its fast descent.

Shinji was to far gone to see the brutally simple trap the MP had laid out. When he saw the MP smash the ground in a mangled heap he smiled slightly a sick and twisted smile that held unadulterated hatred. Then with a crash that shook the world to its very core Unit-01 hit the ground.

Asuka who had awaken during the air battle looked on in horror her own suffer wounds forgotten for the time. She looked at the crater made by Unit-01 knowing that nothing could survive. The girl began to wept for the boy that she loved yet had never admitted it to; when from the corner of her eye she saw it. A horror that could not existence the MP that had smashed into the ground first was raising and its mangled body regenerating.

The second MP that had not smashed itself into the ground circled the dust cloud of the purple mecha for a short time then landed by its brethren and together over standing over the crater they let lose a roar to wake the dead. The roar echoed as the two units turned their grossly misshapen heads upon what remained of Asuka's red unit and with a sick grin they took flight and slowly they moved on Unit-02.

Asuka was frightened, the two remaining MP's were flying toward her at a deliberately slow pace and she could not defend herself against their tide. The units were but a hundred yards from her when they touched down that sick feral grin still on their faces. The advance then continued.

The two Evas stood over the powered down remains of Unit-02, the one who still possessed the spear like blade took lead and then that grin on the two unit's faces faltered into another roar that rocked the earth in its intensity. Then ready to strike the last blow the lead unit raised its great blade.

A roar answered the white Evangelion's only this roar sounded like the devil himself. The two great white beasts turned to face the source of the still echoing roar and looked directly at the crater. Three minds worked furiously to comprehend the situation all of them new that nothing could have survived that fall, and yet what else could it be.

From the dust and debris of the crater a shadow appeared its form that of a human. As it slowly stepped out of the cloud that surrounded it to reveal a boy with brown hair and deep blue eyes that were still filled with rage. It looked like Shinji Ikari at first glance but when one looked closer you could see a larger more muscled frame with scars and markings like that of Unit-01 without its armor. The scars were, if anyone were to review the battles in which the purple unit had been hurt, on the same spots and with the same pattern as the Eva.

Asuka looked that the small figure that was walking from the crater and was filled with horror and shock. 'What is that thing? Is it Shinji?' These questions raced repeatedly through the girls mind.

The white beasts faces slowly returned to there sick and devilish grin. There enemy had lost its protection it would be easily killed.

The boy only stared at the white units with hatred and continued his slow march across the ground toward them. He saw the lead Evangelion raise its great blade up and start to swing it at him, and still he continued his march as the blade made its painfully slow arch in the sky. Asuka seeing the attack and wishing to warn whatever it was that came from the crater yelled, "Move. It's attacking with the blade, run." Her words had no effect on the figure that just ignored the warning and the woosh of the falling blade.

As the weapon was within sixty feet of the walking boy, a strange glow started in the whites of his eyes as the pupils became dark and an x-shaped red pattern appeared on the retinues then began to spin. Once the blade was twenty feet from the boy a great roar rose from his throat and his eyes flared then the blade smashed headlong into an orange hexagonal barrier, an A.T. field.

The beast could not understand this, the being before it was clearly the Third Child and not an Angel or Evangelion and yet hear it was raising an A.T. field to defend itself. The unit pulled back its great blade and was preparing another strike when it felt the flare of an A.T. field pressing against its own.

Shinji had his hands raised out and the orange field began to change and shift as the young man transformed the defensive purpose into an offensive one. The orange field arched across the white units belly; the beast trying to stop the attack with its own A.T. field but it could not stand against the massive power that the small figure was exerting and it was cut in half the S2 organ torn to pieces that began to explode.

Asuka from the torn remains of Unit-02 saw the S2 engine began to go critical and new it was over Shinji, her and what ever stood before the Evangelions now had put up a good fight but there was no way that they would survive the blast. When she looked upon the face of the new being that looked so much like Shinji she did not see fear or any emotion except a mixture of anger and amusement.

"What is it Unit-09 do you think that this blast will destroy me? The one who killed so many of your brethren and Angels," asked the figure in loud voice the power continued to build. Then as the blast reached critical the flare of light started to engulf the three beings left standing but reseeded. The light retreated back to the engine that generated it at the will of the boy.

The white Eva saw the self-destruct of its fellow being blocked by this boy and new that a frontal assault would never work so its primitive brain began to think and one thing came to mind, the girl. Yes the boy would defend the girl and if she was endanger then he would not attack. Perfect.

The white unit began to move and in a flash had what it wanted from the torn and battered Unit-02. It turned as it felt the flaring of an A.T. field behind it and showed the boy what he had in his hand. "I...have...her," stuttered the Eva in a canine sounding voice.

"So to defeat me you would use her as a shield, is that it? Well it will not work this time I've changed. I realized that by doing nothing I only caused more pain for those that I cared about and so now I will do something and if she is hurt well then at least I tried."

Asuka who was frightened beyond words heard all of this and was stunned by the fact that Shinji had changed so much. That was until she felt the grip around her tightening, 'What the hell is this thing doing?' But the grip tightened and tightened as the unit stared at the boy down below.

"You should not have threatened me now you will feel my power." With those words an A.T. field flared around Asuka and the hand was no longer felt the field protecting her.

The white Unit-09 seeing this finally had its chance and took it. A large fist swung down on the boy who never even saw it. The fist was mere inches from the young man's head when an A.T. field flared to protect him. 'How he is protecting the girl.'

And as if Shinji could read the mind of the MP, "Yes I am protecting her, but you have forgotten the fact that my mother was in the Eva. So the evangelion is protecting Asuka, the pilot, the mother is protecting the son, and now the most powerful of the A.T. fields I control will kill you," said Shinji and with the last word a third field in the shape of a lance appeared and was thrust through Unit-09's gut.

The white unit only stared then as its S2 engine began to overload asked one last question, "How?"

"It is my own," said Shinji as he started to disappear, his form wavering. When the S2 exploded the two fields used to protect held strong and as the light faded Shinji's form could be seen turning and looking out over the Geofront as if waiting. Asuka floated down next to him on the A.T. field.

"It's over," she said in a voice of relief and exhaustion.

"No, not yet. There is still one thing left to do," said Shinji as the ground quacked as the giant Rei rose out of the ground.

As the giant that looked like Rei rose into the air the souls of the people of the earth began to join her in the sky. Asuka felt strange for a moment as her body started to lose its integrity, before her eyes the glowing form of her soul appeared and danced around. The young pilot futilely tried to catch the orb in between her hands, then two large hands gingerly cupped the glowing orb and the shaky feeling that the girl had been immersed in was lifted. Shinji looked at the glowing orb that was a soul for several moments then slowly pressed it into Asuka's breast, as it disappeared Shinji spoke, "Asuka I love you and I want you to be happy when this is over, do you understand?"

Asuka looked up at the once spineless boy that she had fall for and saw a man like none she had seen before. "What happened to you Shinji, before when you came out of the cages you where different now you are even more so," asked Asuka in a quiet voice since she was afraid of the man that stood before her.

Shinji sighed heavily, 'there just was not time to do this he had to stop Rei. But never had he told this girl no and he would not start now.' "Ok, well I was hiding under a stairwell when the JSSDF attacked, waiting to die," Shinji held up a hand as the girl started to speak, "Just listen to me, I was waiting to die for all the sins that I commented against everyone when three commandos walked up to me and where going to kill me. The commander looked at me and said that I wasn't worth his time. When he said that I lost it, I flew into a rage and killed him and the others with a metal bar that was next to me," the young man shuddered slightly at that, as Asuka paled a shade. "Misato saw me and was frightened but lead me to the eva cages. Then I felt a power, the same power that had freed me of the Sea of Dersis and helped against the 14th...it was my mother and another, the blood of Lilith that flows through Unit-01 they made the wings and I rose up into the sky. I looked at the battle then you where hit by the lance, it caused the same rage from earlier. You saw the battle so I won't explain it."

"What about what you now," inquired the red-head when he didn't continue?

Shinji stared at the horizon for a moment then turned and looked into Asuka's eyes, "Shortly before I hit the ground I realized that I could not survive the impact so I asked Lilith and mother for help. They gave me the choice of dieing then or fusing and becoming one being. I took the latter, so now I am the combination of Evangelion Unit-01, Yui Ikari's soul and Shinji Ikari's body and soul."

"You mean that you aren't my Shinji," asked Asuka looking away from his iron hard stare.

"Yes, and no I am him and more. Asuka let me go and have a good life because this is where we part ways. There is only one way to stop this and end the threat of instrumentality, that's to stop Rei and then unlock the genetic secret of the human genome. I'll remove the seal and then man will continue to evolve," tears started to form on the man's face as he looked at Asuka. "That means that I am going to die."

Asuka hit the man hard over and over again as tears fell freely from her eyes. And one word was repeated again and again, why? "Don't you love me, aren't I good enough?" Cried the German girl as she fell into Shinji's embrace.

"Yes, I love you and that's why I must do this. I must go but don't worry you I will always be with you here," he said and pointed at her head the pointed at her heart, "and here. Now I must go or it will be too late," with those words he pulled her into an embrace and kissed her. When the man let go he smiled a sad smile and slowly walked toward the edge of the hole made from Rei's raising body.

Asuka looked on as tears fell freely from her face and she stared at the man that she loved. The girl mouthed good bye as he reach the opening.

The man turned and spoke, "No, not good bye my Asuka, just...until next time." With those words the young man jumped and flipped in the air then stopped falling and rose high up into the sky to Rei. He smiled as he felt the Angel before him extend its A.T. field but to no avail. The being that came to her was to powerful.

He reached her head and spoke softly but his voice carried none the less, "I am sorry Rei, but this must stop." Two orange fields rose from the figure and clashed with the one the Angel raised in defense. One field destroyed the Angels while the other clutched the souls and then lowered them into the LCL below. "Time to destroy the last threat to the human race," the man's hands rose and two fields once again appeared before him. The Angel whipped its hand toward him and in that motion shrank to the size of a human.

"You are a fool lilium to think that you can kill me. I am both the first and the mother," spoke the strangely deep voice that cracked with age.

"No, I can see all now for I and the merging of three souls. So the universe is at my feet just as the past and future are. I will free them of your control." An orange field rose and raced to the humanoid Angel, who side-stepped easily.

The Angel focused its power into an attack that I was sure would kill this announce. When it released the massive blade of light it turned and started to walk away, knowing that the human couldn't survive.

'So foolish of you human you should have joined the rest of them and lived without pain or fear. Oh well it can't be helped.'

Shinji saw the massive blade coming and quickly jumped into a roll away from it while raising a defensive barrier. He saw the being turn away and thought, 'So arrogant.' He came out of the roll on his feet and started toward the Angel then when he was only a few meters away let lose a roar that shook the Earth and brought the orange field shape like a reaper down and across.

The Angel barely had time to raise a defense upon hearing the roar of the beast. As he turned to see his enemy what was there was impossible. What stood there was not a rogue beast but the boy his eyes aglow and rage clearly seen through the glaze that covered the glowing eyes. 'No you can not be alive. That blast would have killed one of my children you could not have survived it.'

The man walked forward slowly getting closer and closer to Lilith with each step, and Lilith for her part was backing away a half step in match with Shinji. The boy turned killer raised his hand and a large sweeping slash flowed from it.

Lilith stared her A.T. field just blocking as wisps of blue hair drifted down from her right shoulder. 'That stupid worm I will finish him now.' A blinding light surrounded her hand then it retreated into her palm, she then pointed he fist at the boy and opened her fist loosing a massive blast that could have killed all the other Angels excluding Adam with its power. The man however didn't even flinch as the light enveloped him.

From the light that came another light only it was a black light that let you see but did not provide cheer or reflections this light lanced out in a beam striking the angelic figure in the heart. The light around the man faded into black and then all trace of it was gone, leaving the stunned Angel and the man staring into one another's eyes. The lance like black beam lifted the skewered Angel up off her feet, then in a rush brought her an inch from the face of her soon to be killer. "Rei, I am sorry. I want you to know that you were my friend and as such I will end your existence quickly." Shinji then reach out and kissed the girl draining away her life in an instant.

The figure began to fall with out the support of the lance that had seen to its demise but strong arms caught her. The boy walk forward a ways then hummed a soft sad tune. Upon the end of the humming the earth shook slightly as a hole was torn into the ground from the blue and white remains of Unit-00. Tears welling in his eyes Shinji started to sing. As the sing reach its second minute the blue and white armor and flesh began to regenerate forming the once dead Evangelion prototype.

Asuka walked toward what had only a short time ago been site of the most titanic battle since the war of the Gods. She then heard a soft voice choked with emotion, it was singing. 'Shinji?! Why is Shinji singing?' The pilot heard the words as she crested the hill and saw the single eyed form of Unit-00. "What is he doing?"

Once the Evangelion was finished regenerating the man walked around behind it where the entry plug was to be inserted; at a silent command the head fell forward and a steel cylinder spun out. The Third Child rose into the air quiet tears rolling down his face. When he reached the hatch a light flashed and it fell open. Saying a soft prayer he laid the girl in his arms into the liquid filled tube and closed the door. As he floated away a short distance song rose from his throat and the Unit's single eye flashed then it looked at the man, before taking flight on wings of light. "Good bye," was whispered as the blue and white biped flow into the far reaches of space.

Asuka simply stared at her first love, as all this transpired. Then while she watched he shot into the air and spreading the glowing wings of Unit-01. Upon reaching the very edge of space Shinji wrapped the glowing wings around the world in a protective manner.

The first A.T field of the Mother raced out snatching up the souls of humanity and cradling them. The second man from man then washed over the LCL that was the remains of humanities physical form raising it up to meet the souls it once housed. As the man tried to combine them they would not merge. A puzzled look came to Shinji's face that was shortly replaced by one of horror and sadness.

Something cutch the attention of the red-head who was watch the event, an orange streak of a falling object was clearly seen falling just shy of where she stood. With an ear spitting roar the thing landed and there on his knees with his hands holding his face was Shinji Ikari. The boy was rocking back and forth crying, "No not her. God please not her."

Asuka walked up to the man and knelt wrapping her arms around his neck holding him. His arms slowly grabbed her and held tight. "What is it? Why are you so upset," ask the girl?

"You...You...have to die. To being them back you must die," choked out the disturbed figure in the arms of the red-head. The girl froze. She then heard his voice soft and distant, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Why," Asuka asked after several minutes? The man that was holding her stayed silent as if he had not heard her. Anger welled in the temperamental German, "Answer me damn it! Why must I die?" The man cringed at the last word and finally looked up into her eyes.

"To rebuild the human form a male and female must both be used; the reason for Adam and Lilith."

"But Lilith and Adam were still alive. We just saw Lilith, damn it. Why would we die," screamed the clearly upset girl.

"We would die because Adam and Lilith were angels and we are mere mortals. Because Man ate of the fruit of wisdom and the Angels ate of the fruit of life there by making them able to create life or return it if it is mortal without giving there lives. Man cannot he is trapped and bound by his great intellect. Will you be the mother to them or will we all disappear into the void from which we came?"

"Why can't me and you just start over? Have children and repopulate the world?"

"It will not work I will die shortly because of the massive energy required to keep an eva and two souls alive, will drain away whatever life force I still have. So what is your chose," asked Shinji as he looked her in the eye?

"I..I..will do it. I will save them, but one thing needs done first. We must preserve the history that lead to this point so they don't repeat it," said the German bravado rising in her as she began to except what she must do.

"Of course, Mother will take care of it. You needed worry," said the boy with a soft sad smile gracing his face.

Shinji then proceeded to pick up the girl in his arms, the wings of golden energy slowly flapping the air behind him until he flow into the air. The two A.T. fields that held the remains of humanity floated up to him and the stunned German. The man spread his wings around all of the world and spoke to the red-head, "Just will them together Asuka."

The girl did just that and form came to the lifeless LCL upon them taking back there shape, the girl smiled. The man then willed the souls back to their respective bodies and they merged. The field holding the humans then set them down while releasing the genetic seal holding in their potential. "Time to give up our power and give them life."

Shinji then spread his A.T. field and sent all his power into as the thing spread a thin strand to all the people give them life or some of it. Asuka did the same and the people began to come back as both set of eyes darkened. "We did it," said Asuka as the two started to disperse into a thousand particles.

Then Shinji released a grasp, 'No!" he thought as one fell apart followed by another and another. All of humanity fell apart and their souls disappeared fading from existence as the two lovers joined them.

One question floated through the endless void of space, "Why?" The question that man had asked for millennia but never answered echoed on, the last tribute to the great wisdom and folly that was humanity. God in his heaven laughed a sad laugh. All is right in the world.

**End**

Notes: Ok, it is some what confusing so if there are questions email me at and I will try to answer them. Also it was difficult to decide on an ending for this, I hope it worked. Anyway if I get 15 reviews asking for change or improvement then I will revise it, thanks a lot and please review.

Hailofire


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